Coffee at 6Say yes in the first month
The first few weeks are when people invite you to things. Lunch with the team, a colleague's birthday, a cousin's friend who “knows everyone”. Go, even when you're tired. Every yes now is a name you know next month.
Build a routine with people in it
Friendship mostly comes from seeing the same people again and again. Pick one or two things you'll do every week, at the same time, in the same place:
- Five-a-side football or badminton. Most Indian cities have floodlit turfs and courts you can book by the hour, and teams that need a player.
- A running or cycling group. Many meet early on weekend mornings.
- A class: a language, dance, music, pottery.
- Volunteering, a book club, or a quiz night.
- The same café, at the same time. Being a regular is underrated.
Use work, and where you live
Colleagues are often new to the city too. Suggest something simple after work: chai, a walk, a film. In your building or neighbourhood, say hello to the same people twice and the third time is a conversation.
Make small plans, not big promises
“We should hang out” rarely happens. “Coffee at six on Thursday?” usually does. A small, specific plan is easy to say yes to, for a friend or a date.
Coffee at 6 is built for exactly this. See who's genuinely nearby, never where they are, and make a plan: coffee for two, or a group plan for 3 to 12, like five-a-side or a walk. Love and friendship both start with saying yes to the same evening.
Stay safe while you settle in
In a new city you don't yet know which areas are busy at night or how long things take. Meet in central, public places, get there on your own, and tell someone where you're going. Our safe dating tips apply to meeting friends too.
Moving to Kerala?
If you're new to Kochi, Thiruvananthapuram, Kozhikode or Kottayam, start with the city pages: easy places to meet, the areas people live in, and a few ideas for a first plan. See Kerala.